Well, now… I do believe the Eastern gray squirrel (Sciurus carolinensis) deserves representation on Dust Tracks! After all, they’ve given so much to me over the years. Yes, rivaled only by the ring-billed and laughing gulls, Eastern gray squirrels have given me more of their time and attention than pretty much anything else in the world. Like, you know, every time I’m eating chips in a park? There’s a squirrel. Or when I’m walking around campus? A couple of squirrels. Or when I’m, oh I don’t know, trying to keep the bird feeder full? A legion of squirrels. An army of dastardly squirrels.
Yeah, I’ve got mixed feelings for these large rodents. Sure, I guess they’re kinda cute and all, but when the end of days comes and I’m hunting food for my family with nothing but a slingshot and bag full of pennies, I’ll have no problem burying a good number of Lincolns in these little dudes. I did, however, promise myself to wait until the end of days to commit such acts. Because, you know, that would be cruel. Unless the world is ending, in which case pretty much everything will suck.
So, in the meantime, I’m working on that whole tolerance and appreciation twofer-combo. I feel like
I should say something nice about the squirrel featured here. Hmmm… Lemme think. Yeah, I got it: look at those cute, red eyes! They’re like the devil’s eyes piercing into your mortal essence! Looking for a way to rob you of your very soul! Cute squirrel! Rah!
Later: we’re talkin’ paramilitary, armored assault transport action!
~ janson
Filed under: Florida, Mammals Tagged: Sciurus carolinensis
